A few posts back, we got on to the subject of infertility and the pain families go through who cannot have children. We also discussed the stupid things people say. Some people like me say stupid things just because I am trying to make conversation and I don't stop to think about what I am saying. Other people say stupid mean things and they misrepresent God at the same time.
Some people think and say that bad things happen to Christians as punishment for something they did. This is never true. Romans 8:1 says "There is therefore now NO condemnation to them who are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit" If God kept me from having children because of some sin, that would be condemnation.
We have a dear pastor friend whose two daughters have died. Their two remaining sons have a rare genetic condition called leukodystrophy and will die before they reach adulthood. This is a devastating blow to any family. Two years ago this pastor was unjustly accused of having an affair. When my friend asked the accusers what proof they had they said "Well, why do you think their girls died?" How stupid and mean is that?
God allows things in my life that are good for me, whether I think they are good or not. I also have faith that whatever horrible thing I may face on this earth is in no way comparable to Heaven. God is simply preparing me for His presence. If He didn''t keep His own Son from suffering, what can we expect?
Now, don't get me wrong. Sin has its consequences. Always. But they are consequences, not divine punishment.
My dear Sisters, I am so sorry for whatever is causing you pain. Please remember that God is with you in your suffering and is always there to dry your tears. Please forgive our stupid and thoughtless comments.
R
Odds and ends and breaking the silence
2 years ago
6 comments:
What a great post! How sad for that Pastor to know that people thought that it was something he had done to cause such pain and suffering in his family, as if the pain wasn't enough to cope with. We as Christians can get things so mixed up, if we only read our bibles and see the true nature of Christ we will see what folly our fleshly thoughts are. We can sometimes think that we are being righteous in our thoughts about people, when really we are being judgemental. Blessings.
People...including me!!...will say things without thinking and end up doing harm to someone without intending to. We have got to let God be more in control in our lives to keep us from saying those hurtful and wasted things. I know people say "Well...I'm human!!...I will make mistakes" and yes we will...but if God is in control in our lives like He should be and like He wants to be then the words that proceed out of our mouths will not be hurtful. We have got to start thinking before we speak so as not to hurt someone with our words. To speak such things is to misuse our conversation and to say wasteful words. God help us all not to do this!!
Amen to that! Thank you both for your words of wisdom. "Think before you speak" is something to remember. And We need to renew our mind to think as HE would!
Have A great day!
R
I had an experience were I said the wrong thing to a friend...and I learned something. My childhood friend (I think of her as a little sister)miscarried her first child a few years ago. I had just found out about my infertility a few monthes before, and so this was very upsetting to me. While she was sad of course, she was very at peace that God was in control. At the time I didn't get that. I was devastated for her and went to visite her the day after her loss. I told her how sorry I was and that I would be happy to reccomend such and such doctor so that she could find out what went wrong. I told her all about the things that I had been studying about fertility. Finally she stopped me and told me that her loss was apart of God's plan for her life. I was speachless. At this point I was angry at God, so I thought she must have been crazy to be so "ok". Less than two monthes later, she was expecting again. She gave birth to a healthy baby girl, she is a joy. Now, knowing that my friend was right, I wonder at her faith. It took me monthes to allow God to give me the truth, she accepted it right away.
Bethanie,
We all have to go through the process. We don't just "arrive"
It takes some people longer than others, but the processes may be totally different. That is why we cannot judge why someone is going through something. We cannot know what God is doing in them and through them. Most people I know who have gone through terrible things later say that they wouldn't change a thing if they could because of all that they learned and grew in the process of pain.
Thank you so much for sharing!
R
I could not agree with you more! Oh we can be so cruel to one another. I have a friend who recently had another unsuccessful try at getting pregnant. I can not imagine her pain. Thank you again for your wisdom!
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