These things only happen to us!

A new family started attending our church. Dad, Mom and two boys. They seemed nice, they had a charismatic background, but weren't attending church. They seemed nice enough, but the lady was kinda strange. She hated the fact that we didn't have women preachers, since her Mama was a preacher. She insisted on calling me the "Pastora" even though she was corrected often, and by everybody. But that wasn't enough. When we had a big preachers conference, with Bro Bill Smith as the speaker, she got up to give a testimony that lasted 10 minutes....and the she broke out into song! We were so embarrased. She was well behaved for a while, but then just last June, during the visit of our sending pastor, she got up again to give testimony. Not in her seat, no, she had to go forward. Unfortunately, Neil was in the baptistry, about to baptize when she started her show. You see, she had just come out a few weeks prior, of a major operation to remove a tumor from her liver. She was so thankful to the Lord for healing her that she promised God to go to seven different churches to give testimony. Not only did she give testimony for another 10 minutes, she lifted up her shirt to reveal her scar, and all of her chunky midsection! The church was packed with about 175 people. I was sitting at the piano, wanting the earth to open up and swallow me......or her. Our pastor later joked with us about our "Flasher"
To end, she recently told one of our deacons that they weren't coming anymore, that no one was going to change her mind about women pastors. Too bad. Well, not really. I don't have enough energy to deal with her!